Each week, we give every episode at least 24 hours to breathe and for you to get caught up. After that, you’re clicking at your own risk. Spoilers ahead.
Besides that amazing ending to the 4th episode of this 6th season, there were also some major teams being formed as well. First, major fist pump for Jon and Sansa! Theon and Yara are starting a campaign before the Kingmoot. Cersei and Jaime finally have the Queen of Thorns and Kevan on their side. Then Tyrion and Varys did some wheeling and dealing.
So which of these alliances are #1 Contenders for the Tag-Team Title Belts?
Now for the Rankings…
1. Daenerys Stormborn (Previously 22nd)
Say what you will about Beyonce or Taylor Swift, but right now…Daenerys > All.
She didn’t need dragons to prove her point this time because SHE IS ONE. With the help of #TrueDectiveSeason3 (Jorah & Daario, in case you’re new here), she burned the whole Dothraki infrastructure down to the ground. You have to love how she just smiled as Khal Moro flung every insult possible her way before lighting every single one of his cohorts up in their council. Now she has added to her forces with the entire Dothraki population and can return to Meereen to raise more hell before heading west.
2. Sansa Stark (Previously 13th)
This was certainly a moment we all hoped for and I appreciate the Game of Thrones showrunners for not prolonging it any longer. In Castle Black and with Jon’s support, Sansa can build the army she rightfully deserves. It also took her forcing the issue of saving Rickon and the North from Ramsay for Jon to get his head out of his ass a little too. This is where Sansa’s revenge officially begins.
3. Cersei Lannister (Previously 4th)
It’s funny how “Mean Girls”-ish the Small Council was being toward Cersei and Jaime. Cersei has Tommen’s trust now and even without “authority and dignity” (as Ollena points out) she has the trust of the small council again too, using Margaery’s atonement as leverage. Now is her chance to destroy the High Sparrow.
4. Jon Snow (Previously 1st)
I think it’s understandable to have some melancholy after being brought back from the dead, but nobody wanted to see Jon leave Castle Black. Sansa gives him purpose now. Although he seems unsure of the decision he’s making, Rickon in danger and revenge for Sansa should be enough motivation to kick Ramsay’s ass.
5. Brienne (Previously 14th)
Brienne held NOTHING back in this episode. “Oh you guys miss Stannis? I executed that bitch.” Now she’s established herself as a force within Castle Black and can better protect Sansa if the dangerous people there respect her.
6. Night’s King (Previously 6th)
The Night’s King will occupy this spot until we see him again, which appears to be next week. All you need for reference is the “Hardhome” episode.
7. Tyrion Lannister (Previously 2nd)
Tyrion didn’t make any new friends by negotiating with the Masters, but you can see why he was doing it. As we learned from Michael Corleone in The Godfather, “Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer”. He makes a good point that he, Missandei and Grey Worm should have the upper-hand as the Masters underestimate them, but it all may be posturing for when Daenerys returns.
8. Ser Davos (Previously 3rd)
Davos has been great so far this season but now he’s asking questions for answers he probably doesn’t want to hear. Learning that both Stannis and Shireen take the wind out of him, as they were practically his family. Now he’s left with a choice to serve #TeamStark in the war to come or turn his back on them because Brienne killed his king and Melisandre sacrificed his favorite person in the world.
9. Jaime Lannister (Previously 12th)
Not only did Jaime establish his place in the small council again, but he already had a strategy prepared for Kevan and the Queen of Thorns. Kevan may be the hand but Jaime is obviously calling the shots on this plan to get Margaery back and “hopefully” kill the High Sparrow.
10. Melisandre (Previously 7th)
We can see the Red Woman has purpose again as she has obviously pledged allegiance to Jon Snow. Davos’s questions have her reeling a little though, especially the when he points out that Stannis trusted in her more than anyone. It’s still tough to contend with someone who can fire off “blood assassinations” and bring the dead back to life.
11. Olenna Tyrell (Previously 29th)
Big jump for the Queen of Thorns as she sets aside her differences with the Lannister siblings in order to save Margaery and Ser Loras. Jaime and Cersei may just be using her and her motivation only to kill the High Sparrow, but we’re going to see Olenna in all her fiery glory sending her army into action. “Many people will die anyway” was my favorite line from that entire exchange.
12. The High Sparrow (Previously 8th)
He may have the upperhand for now but, man…I am TIRED of this jerk. The weekly soliloquies are getting old and more annoying. I found myself sounding like Homer Simpson while he told that story about his upbringing to Margaery…
13. Tormund Giantsbane (Previously 9th)
Is it me or does Tormund have a HUGE crush on Brienne? He had that “love at first sight” look on his face as she rode in on her horse. He just stared at her while munching on some meat…
Let’s come up with a ship (relationship) name for Tormund and Brienne before someone else does! Send your name with a hashtag to me on Twitter ASAP!
14. Varys (Previously 5th)
Varys didn’t have much to say in this episode, but he did bring the Masters to Mereen to hear Tyrion out. Gaining anyone’s trust makes him more dangerous and powerful. Interested to see where that leads to next week as we see the effects of the deal they made.
15. Ramsay Bolton (Previously 10th)
We learned nothing new about Ramsay. He sucks as a human being and has no regard for any life at all. It’s unfortunate that Osha was brought back after being gone for years to just get killed in his lap. He has also called out Jon Snow, which we hope will be the dumbest decision of his life. Karma’s has to catch up at some point.
16. Petyr Baelish (Previously 18th)
Little Finger’s first appearance this season is a strong one. Like Varys, he knows everything and used his knowledge against Robin’s top general. Robin, like Tommen, may be in charge but we know Baelish is really the one in charge. He is also lending his forces for Sansa’s protection, which should be interesting considering he gave her to Ramsay in the first place.
17. Ser Jorah (Previously 36th)
#TrueDetectiveSeason3 finally solved their mystery by finding Daenerys. Jorah takes a lot of shit from Daario throughout the episode, age jokes and not being good enough for Dany. But it was Jorah’s experience and savviness that gets he and Daario to Daenerys undetected. At the end of the episode, it’s Jorah who keeps his head up as everyone, including Daario, bows in awe of the Kahleesi too.
18. Daario Naharis (Previously 37th)
If Daario wasn’t totally onboard following Daenerys before, he seems to be now. His lack of discipline paid off when he saved Jorah with his trusty knife. But I don’t think he was prepared to see what transpired at the end of the episode. After all the bragging and picking on Jorah, Daario was the one most humbled of the two as he bowed and adverted his eyes.
19. Zombie Mountain (Previously 11th)
I can’t wait for Zombie Mountain to be unleashed on the Sparrows. Do it! Do it now!
20. Wun Wun (Previously 15th)
Also looking forward to this beast being unleashed on the Bolton army.
21. Lord Commander Edd (Previously 16th)
Dolorous Edd being in charge of the Night’s Watch certainly frees Jon up to focus on defeating the Boltons. His loyalty to Jon only improves #TeamStark’s forces too.
22. Yara Greyjoy (Previously 32nd)
Yara had a lot of frustrations to unload on Theon and that was pretty evident. She didn’t want to hear sorries but wasn’t going to let him be the prodigal son either. Accepting his help as she makes a run at control of the Iron Islands was smart though.
23. Jaqen H’gar (Previously 29th)
It would seem we’re going to learn what’s next in Braavos very soon. Hopefully that means we learn more about the super mysterious Jaqen too.
24. “No One” formerly Arya (Previously 20th)
“No One” is going to feel really left out when she finds out Jon and Sansa are taking the fight to Ramsay without her. It would seem she has some work to do in Braavos first…
Sidenote: Does anyone else anticipate a reunion with The Hound coming soon? I don’t think he’s dead…
25. Theon Greyjoy (Previously 35th)
Theon’s home. Yay. He’s also pledging allegiance to his sister, which is probably the best call considering he betrayed her in the rescue attempt. Does being the original heir to the throne give he and his sister enough sway before the Kingsmoot?
26. Tommen Baratheon (Previously 27th)
Good for Tommen, breaking promises with The High Sparrow to help his mother. You wonder if the High Sparrow expected that though and whether or not there’s another trick up the priest’s sleeve. However, Tommen seems to FINALLY be doing something to get Margaery back and that’s a good thing.
27. The Three-Eyed Raven (Previously 23rd)
Where will Doc Brown be taking Bran next as they go “Back to the Future”…or past, whatever.
28. Bran Stark (Previously 24th)
The teaser for the next episode shows Bran seeing the Night’s King for the first time. Learning more about the enemy gets him closer to learning “everything” and hopefully that gets him closer to channeling the dragons to defeat the White Walkers.
29. Ellaria Sand (Previously 28th)
Can we get a “Meanwhile, in Dorne…” soon? It’s weird that Ellaria played such a big part in the premiere and we haven’t seen her since.
30. Leaf (Previously 25th)
Want to see Leaf in some action again soon, but throwing fireballs keeps her in the Top 30.
31. Rhaegal & Viserion (Previously 21st)
As the people of Meereen grow restless, the two dragons on-site are Tyrion’s best chance at keeping order before Daenerys returns.
32. Ghost (Previously 26th)
Ghost now knows his brother Shaggydog is dead. Time for payback…
33. Euron Greyjoy (Previously 31st)
Similar to Ellaria, Euron made his power move early on and we haven’t heard from him since. The Kingsmoot is near and obviously he will be challenging Yara and Theon for control of the Iron Islands. This could get messy because it’s apparent he’s a little crazy…By the way, is it me or does he have some Liev Schreiber to his look?
34. Missandei (Previously 46th)
This was a big episode for both Missandei and Grey Worm. We understood a bit more why neither of them are totally cool with Tyrion. She keeps Tyrion in check a little reminding him that he wasn’t a slave for nearly as long as she and Grey Worm were. When it mattered most too, Missandei even quoted Tyrion to back him in front of the disgruntled freed Meereen citizens.
35. Grey Worm (Previously 47th)
As mentioned just prior, big episode for Grey Worm. You have to appreciate his assertiveness with Tyrion but still supporting him in front of the citizens. Grey Worm doesn’t understand politics like Tyrion and Varys do, but he does know the Masters in this land better. We may learn fast that things don’t roll the same way here as they do in the west where Tyrion is from, diplomatically.
36. Hodor (Previously 35th)
37. Podrick Payne (Previously 48th)
Podrick looked pretty badass riding in with Brienne and Sansa. Didn’t get a word in at the dinner table, but hey…that’s not his thing.
38. Kevan Lannister (Previously 38th)
We’re learning quickly that Kevan is not as overpowering as his late brother but it’s good to see him come around Jaime and Cersei’s way of thinking. He’s also motivated to get Lancel back. Unfortunately, I don’t think Lancel comes out of this thing safely.
39. Qyburn (Previously 30th)
Lurking in the basement shadows, giving candy to kids, trying to be Varys…things seem to be going alright for Qyburn and he’s got Maester Pycelle looking for his shoulder too.
40. Tyene Sand (Previously 34th)
Lack of Dorne screen-time makes it tough to keep Tyene high in this list or much higher than her sisters. But you have to like her best of the three, based on her history so far.
41. Nymeria Sand (Previously 43rd)
42. Obara Sand (Previously 44th)
Did “Obara’s Not Impressed face” catch on yet?
43. Robin Arryn (Previously NR)
First appearance for Robin since Sansa’s SLAP last season was pretty important, especially for Sansa. I actually didn’t even consider this kid would grow like Bran did, but he has an army and he has entrusted decision making to Little Finger.
44. Aeron Greyjoy (Previously 38th)
You get a feeling Aeron is going to rise on this list after the Kingsmoot.
45. Smalljon Umber (Previously 41st)
My fingers are still crossed for a double-cross from Smalljon.
46. Harald Karstark (Previously 42nd)
Whatever Smalljon was referring to regarding Harald and children makes me really nervous about Rickon.
47. Rickon Stark (Previously 45th)
…at least Rickon is serving as motivation for Jon and Sansa to take out Ramsay.
48. Drogon (Previously 53rd)
Whenever you’re done licking your wounds, Drogon, feel free to come back.
49. Meera (Previously 54th)
Anyone else think Meera’s just been sitting in that same spot this entire time, outside of the cave? Bran seeing her father in his Tower of Joy vision should increase her importance sooner than later.
50. Lhazareen (Newbie)
Missandei might get jealous of Dany’s new friend.
51. Waif (Previously 49th)
What’s next for Waif, now that she can’t pick on Arya anymore?
52. Gilly (Previously 39th)
I just pictured Gilly singing “I’m on a Boat!” by Lonely Island. Someone should make that video asap.
53. Samwell Tarley (Previously 40th)
…and Samwell’s still puking.
54. Queen Margaery (Previously 51st)
Margaery seems to have a good understanding of what the High Sparrow is trying to do with her and Lancel but the sooner she can get rescued, the better.
55. Bronn (Previously 52nd)
56. Khal Savo’s widow (Previously 50th)
Not so much like Daenerys now, are ya?
57. Yohn Royce (Previously NR)
Yohn should probably be much higher on this list because he is a commander, but Robin was THIS close to throwing him out of the Moon Door…
58. Septa Unella (Previously 56th)
Your time will come, Septa. And it’s coming soon.
59. Lancel Lannister (Previously 57th)
Bringing up Lancel as a reason for Kevan to help Cersei only makes it more obvious he’s going to die.
60. Ser Loras Tyrell (Previously 58th)
Loras has seen better days. Just not sure if those will be coming anytime soon…or ever again.
61. Mace Tyrell (Previously 59th)
This guy is so unimportant that he wasn’t even present at this last small council meeting.
62. Maester Pycelle (Previously 60th)
Keep farting, old man. This is where you’ll be for a long time.
Anyone too high or too low in this week’s rankings? Let me know on Facebook or Twitter. Don’t forget to checkout The Piffcast, where we regularly discuss the show.